


rainbow pillboxes

by a_court_of_random_fandoms



Category: Wynonna Earp (TV)
Genre: Anxiety, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/F, Fluff and Angst, Light Angst, Panic Attacks, References to Depression, References to PTSD, Wynonna Earp & Nicole Haught Friendship, dissociating
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-16
Updated: 2020-08-16
Packaged: 2021-03-05 21:40:13
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,463
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25942243
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/a_court_of_random_fandoms/pseuds/a_court_of_random_fandoms
Summary: Nicole has a bad episode after being alone for all that time and Wynonna comforts her.
Relationships: Waverly Earp/Nicole Haught, Wynonna Earp & Nicole Haught
Comments: 3
Kudos: 190





	rainbow pillboxes

**Author's Note:**

> I feel like Wynonna knows how Nicole feels bc she's been through some shit asw 
> 
> tw for depression, anxiety, dissociation and references to ptsd 
> 
> shoutout to @Girrafesickle for being my beta :)
> 
> Happy reading!! xx

“Hey sheriff Haught Sauce, we need you for something so get your ass out of bed” Wynonna shouted up the stairs of the homestead

Nicole’s eyes cracked open, the morning sun shining into the room through the gap in the curtains. The next thing she was aware of was the drop in her stomach, growing more intense with each passing second; like a pot that was slowly going to boil over. She didn’t have it in her to shout back to Wynonna. Or get up. Or do anything that wasn’t lie in this bed and wallow.

Fuck.

“Nicole?” Wynonna shouted again. She was met with silence.

“Haught?”

“Okay that’s it- I’m coming in so you better be decent” Wynonna loudly stomped up the stairs and wondered what was stopping the usually bright eyed and bushy tailed cop from being annoyingly chipper.

She slowly creaked the door open, and was met with Nicole lying flat on her back, eyes wide open, covers pushed to the bottom of the bed so only her knees and feet were under the blankets. Her chest was rising and falling at a fast and shallow rate, and she looked unusually pale.

“You don’t look so hot”

“What Wynonna?” Nicole threw out through gritted teeth, unsure of where to put her hands as there was the excess nervous energy she couldn’t seem to get rid of, but at the same time she was exhausted to the core.

On the one hand she was annoyed that Wynonna was going to see her like this, but on the other hand she was secretly glad she had someone to keep her company whilst she fought the demons which had decided to rear their ugly heads. Normally on days like this Waverly would hold her close and whisper soft comforts until the fog rolled away. During those 18 months she had to deal with it herself, trying her hardest not to worry Rachel whilst also crumbling on the inside.

“If you want to ride this wave out alone I can leave, but I really don’t think I should leave you alone. Plus, misery loves company” She was met with quiet

“Have you taken your meds?” Nicole gingerly shook her head

“Okay Haught, I’m gonna go get your pills then I’ll be back. For the love of Christ please don’t do anything stupid okay?”

Nicole didn’t hear, she was slowly retreating into the recesses of her own mind. She was floating away from everything, kind of like in the film Up, but minus the balloons and the sweet old men.

Wynonna ran down the stairs and got Nicole’s pills, water, an ice pack, and the first edible looking snack she could find.

Wynonna knew exactly how Nicole felt at that very moment. She knew all about the days that kick you on the ass and leave you unable to get out of bed. Wynonna knew sadness like an old friend which came in and out her life; she always joked that part of being an Earp was the emotional baggage.

She went back up the stairs, holding all her things and set them down on the dresser opposite Nicole and Waverly’s bed.

“You have to eat before you take your meds, and this was the first un-vegan thing I could find” Wynonna waved the chocolate granola bar in the air before realising that Nicole was probably dissociating into the next dimension.

“Hey Haught, you in there?”

Nothing

Wynonna shuffled towards the bed and sat down gingerly on the edge. She figured she’d just go with the classic ‘talk it out’ approach.

“Nice jammies you got there” Nicole was wearing an old grey t shirt and green joggers, which Wynonna had seen Waverly wear before.

“Well at least you’re wearing something. You and Waves really do need to stop defiling random places in the house. You know I don’t even think the stairs are safe anymore” 

Wynonna saw Nicole’s hands start to tense up so she placed her own over them to try and ground her.

“You know, it must be a Tuesday. Everything seems to go to shit on Tuesday. Like everything” Wynonna sighed deeply

Nicole’s eyes were slowly returning to normal, which Wynonna took as a sign that she was coming back.

“You with me Haught? Give me a sign or something” Nicole weakly squeezed her palm. The fog was slowly clearing but she still felt like pure shit. Like her lungs were filled with water and her limbs were heavy and everything was so tense and hot but at the same time she was freezing and shivering.

“Nice of you to join us. I want you to breathe nice and slow with me okay?” Wynonna realised Nicole was going down the trajectory she knew only all too well. Her breathing grew more shallow and she had started sweating.

Nicole felt her mind racing but going to slow all at the same time. She wasn’t alone anymore but dammit why did she still feel so isolated? She kept the homestead safe, she just about kept Rachel in one piece, but those were only two things. Purgatory had descended into chaos, she had lost her position as sheriff, the thing she had been trying to kill for-

Wynonna started breathing very loudly so Nicole would follow suit. That was a trick all the nurses had used in the numerous hospitals she’d ended up in after various scrapes and escapades. Still gripping Nicole’s hands, she placed one hand on her own chest and another on Nicole’s.

“Try and follow my breathing okay? I know you feel lost and it’s all swirling but you need to fight it okay?”

“In 2 3 4 Hold 2 3 4 Out 2 3 4 There we go, keep going”

Several breathing cycles later Nicole slowly calmed down. Thank fuck as Wynonna was starting to get worried.

“You don’t have to tell me everything, but please talk to someone. Waves? Doc? Rachel? That girl has basically become your kid”

Nicole grimaced.

“The cat? I know you love that weirdo”

Almost on cue, Calamity Jane padded into the room and jumped onto the bed, settling right next to Nicole’s head. Nicole weakly reached out to pull the cat into her chest.

“Wynonna?” Nicole’s throat was dry and her voice sounded like sandpaper

“She has a voice!” Wynonna declared with mock seriousness

“Thanks. You didn’t have-“

“I’m gonna stop you there. That’s what best friends are for. I don’t exactly do feelings, but you are Waves’ saviour so I’ll make an exception”

“You’re surprisingly tender when you want to be”

“Well Haught sauce, I know a thing or two about being trapped in your own mind” She tapped her own head with her ring clad fingers.

“Also are you sure you want the cat in your bed? I’m pretty sure it licks the bathroom floor”

“Like you’ve not done worse Wynonna”

Wynonna chucked the granola bar towards Nicole “Eat. I know you haven’t taken your meds in a few days”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about” Nicole feigned innocence

“Well I know you write the dates on each packet, and you’re about 4 days behind. I’m not judging but you should take one now”

“I just….. forgot. There’s so much going on now”

“I’ll get Waves to make sure you take them”

"Oh please, you know what she's like for organisation"

Needless to say, a few days later, Nicole slowly shuffled downstairs for the first time to see Waverly putting all her pills in a weekly pillbox. Of course it was rainbow. Of course Waverly was writing tiny inspirational notes and folding them up to put in each day's box. 

"Hey babygirl" 

"Hey cutie"

"You feeling better today?"

"Yeah"

It had taken the rest of the day with Wynonna, and later Waverly to try and fight the demons. They didn't leave her side, either telling jokes or listening to music, or sitting in silence until late in the evening. Even when Wynonna went to bed, Waverly stayed up with Nicole's head in her lap as she fell into a deep sleep (fighting against your own mind can be exhausting). The next day she managed to haul herself out of bed and into the shower for a scalding hot soak, but she still couldn't bring herself to go downstairs.

'Slow progress is better than no progress' Waverly had singsonged to her, but she felt frustrated. It had taken her another day to muster the effort to change, even with Waverly helping her, and it wasn't until the day after that she could go downstairs. 

Waverly spun around so she was facing Nicole, and pulled her into a big hug. 

"I promise we'll never, ever leave you again Nicole" Waverly whispered into her ear


End file.
